The love/hate for the NHS

I absolutely love the NHS, specifically that I get great health care at no price. However, with socialized medicine there are some minor set backs, which, while minor, can really annoy the hell out of you.

Today, I went to the doctor to get put back onto the Anti-Coagulant clinic's roster as I "hadn't been attending" since I had been removed from blood thinners (b t dubs, I'm back on them for what looks like the rest of my life), and the only way is to have my doctor call in for me. I tell the receptionist at my local doctor's that I need to talk about my warfarin and INR as soon as possible with the doctor and she gives me an appointment for the following Friday (mind you this is a whole week away at the time). Fine, whatever.

I wait it out, and go to the doctor today only to get lectured that I should have come to them sooner, that my INR might dangerously high, and I could have to spend the night in the hospital hooked up to a Vitamin K drip. Sounds like a stellar Friday, right?

My doctor asks me to call back at 5 PM to find out what my INR levels are. I call, the receptionist tells me they will call me Monday. I try to explain that I have to talk to the doctor on call tonight as my doctor instructed me to do so, she tells me to call back Monday (as that MUST be what my doctor really meant). Finally, I tell her that I need to talk to him to see if I have to spend the night in the hospital and that it's a near emergency at this point. Finally, she puts me through. I'm fine. No hospital tonight!

I think my major problem is that I don't know the magic words to get around the receptionist. I think I'm saying things to express the urgency, but it doesn't seem to work, and in order to get an urgent appointment, I apparently need to convince her it's really important. If anyone has some tips, please let me know. I've tried warfarin, i've tried INR, I've tried "the doctor told me to call back at this time" and yet it doesn't seem to work. Grr.

Okay, that complaint was more about the receptionist than the NHS, but it's kind of the same problem that I have with the whole NHS. It's not that you have to wait so long for the appointments as most people think, it's the bureaucracy of it all. You have to walk through so much red tape (hence the "I HAVE to see the doctor to get onto the clinic's list again but then I get in trouble for not getting the INR checked earlier"), that it slows down the process.

Many people have asked me about the NHS and socialized medicine as it was a hot topic during the election. As I've put it, if I feel I need something done quickly (that isn't an emergency) I'll get it done when I'm in the States. However, when I spent a week in the hospital for my stroke, I didn't have to pay a dime! Or I guess a 10p. So really, I shouldn't complain so much, but it's bureaucracy that's so prevalant in every day life in the UK that drives me nuts some times.

Update

Lately, I've been trying to work on my dissertation and having some major issues with feeling like it'll never get done. But I know it will.

Of course one of the major distractions from this is the biggest and best news I've had in over a year... drum roll please!

no more blood clot!!!!

That's right kids, the CT scan came back and I'm in the clear. Sadly, most celebrating has been put on hold until the 15th.

One of those days

Yesterday, was one of those days. Where I stressed and disappointed and home sick all at once. I started out the day finishing up my PhD application and the application for the ORSAS funding which usually goes to science applicants rather than arts, or so I've been told by people other than my professor who encouraged me to apply--so who knows.

I applied online for the PhD but I needed to take the ORSAS application into the office, so I hurried off to the office around 2, dropped it off, then headed to the bus stop to hitch a ride to the hospital for my check up. Well, the bus only takes exact change so my 10 quid didn't really work and I ended up taking the subway to Govan and catching a bus there; which was waiting at the stop when I got there. PERFECT, right?

Well alls well until I realise the hospital has 3 bus stops with in it. I get off at the wrong one and desperately look around for the Neurology building which I haven't been to since I was released from the acute stroke ward. I go into one building to ask about it, they point me in the right direction, and I carry on. Then it starts to hail. I've never been caught outside in the hail but that fucking sucked. I've also dealt with strong winds in Kansas, but I was nearly knocked over with the sheer force of the wind making my face sting. I had my gloves on and was desperately pulling my hat down and my scarf up. I go into the Neurosurgery/neuro whatever the fuck building, but oh yeah, it's not the right one. So I have to run in the hail across the street to the right building. Get there, forget the name of the doctor I'm supposed to be seeing, finally figure out where I'm going, sit down, and shiver to death. Seriously, I was soaked to the bone and freezing. It didn't help that the doctor kept his windows open because his "mind works better when it's chilly." So, I shiver in my wet jeans as he tells me he won't see me again till May, then he'll scan my brain, but he wants to keep me on the blood thinners for close to a year.

Great, exactly the opposite of what I wanted to hear. I say fuck it to the bus and subway and call a cab, where I try to fight back the tears of frustration. Get let out on my street, grab some food (I've been living off cereal because I'm being cheap) and finally come in, undress, jump under the covers and cry.

I really really don't want to be on these blood thinners for a year. I was told it would be 6 months to a year, but now the doctor is basically saying it'll be a year or more... oh wait maybe 11 months. If i'm lucky I'll be off it by my birthday.

There's a part of me that wants to blame Scotland, to say "if I had never come here this never would have happened." But I know that's not true. It would have happened any where, the bright side is once again I don't have to pay so it's better in a way to have had it here. I'm still depressed about it though. Yesterday I just wanted to go home so bad. I wanted to curl up with my dog and cat under some blankets and call it quits for awhile.

I reached my breaking point, but there's not much I can do about it now. Already signed over the loans to pay for this semester, and I would probably end up miserable no matter where I went because I would still be dealing with this blood clot and daily reminders of nearly dying.

It'll get better, I was just really hoping that doctor's appointment would go better. That he would have scanned me yesterday and giving me only a few more months on it instead of 9. Oh well, I know, it's better to have a year of this rather than the rest of my life, but still. I just want it to be over.

they say everything changes

It's been nearly three weeks since my stroke and last week was my first week back in class and only the second week i've been to since it started at the end of September. Let me discuss last tuesday. let me discuss how i now hate tuesdays in general. not only was i rushed to the ER twice on a tuesday, but last tuesday may have been one of most not so good days i've had in awhile (aside from the tuesday two weeks before that). I met up with my friend Lilly for lunch at the Subway in the GU--that part was okay aside from the fact that i'm exhausted all the time and the littlest things tire me. I learned later not only is that a result of the stroke but of the blood thinners as well. Lucky me. So I get to class and i'm already tired (mind you, the uni is atop a hill very much like the one at Oxy so it's already a trek before you add the fact i'm still recovering) and my head hurts. I take a paracetemol and manage to get through the 90 minute class but I'm dreading the 20 minute walk back (downhill is the plus side). I stop back at the GU to pick up some highlighters and pens (since the pens i stole from hotels years ago). Head home, stop at the corner store for some basic groceries, realize i can't be arsed to cook and pick up a sandwhich get to my flat and realize i've lost my keys. Thus begins the frantic search of my bag, the take away place, my bag again, the corner store, and my bag a third time. I call my flat mate who lets me. I eat my sandwhich then empty out the contents of my bag completely then head out to retrace all my steps back to class. Well, the damn key is gone and being tired, not feeling well, and really annoyed i go back to my room and call it a day. Then I find information on strokes and blood clots and realize just how serious it was and that i could have died. Let the emotional break down begin.

so i ended up curled up in a ball crying on tuesday debating if i was going to stay or go.

since then things have been better (aside from the fact that the laundry room shuts off for an hour or two in the middle of the night and with the clocks changing last night i couldn't get my clothes out of the washer until this morning) and i think i'm going to stay.

Speaking of laundry: i miss what i called the magic drying rooms in sweden. It was a giant room with a hot air fan and clothes line. Brillant! You hang your clothes up and they dry so nicely and pretty quickly. The swedes might actually do everything better.

Thursday I may have stumbled on a dissertation topic involving fellini and ther american movie musical genre. I have bought a collection of his films (8 1/2, juliet of the spirits, la dolce vita, and another one i keep forgeting) to see if i can really do this topic. I also bought belle de jour, and the blue angel (blue angel being for class this week and highly reccomended by Lilly) and belle de jour because borders was having a special offer and i love catherine!

before i ended this rather long post, i would like to add that the scottish have a very different idea of a farmer than Americans. They involved lots of plaid hats like grandfathers or golfers wear, giant rain boots/wellies, and coveralls like mechanics would wear. Hello? what about cowboy boots and hats?

Change...

the whole sordid truth.

I was just released from the hospital so i feel like i should give you a full blown update.

what happened: after a migraine for two days i woke up to find my left side numb. My flatmate and i went to the hospital they said that it was probably viral menengitis, would give me some medicine/painkillers and forget about the lumbar puncture for now.

i went home and with in an hour woke up from my nap spasming and yelling for my flatmates to help. one called 999 the other tried to get me to respond. she said i was stiff unresponsive and my pupils were huge and i sounded like i was gagging/snoring while i was breathing.

paramedics came, they thought i was a) american and therefore stupid, b) a college student and therefore stupid, and c) i must have OD'ed on the "drugs" in my room (aka my zoloft for anxiety which if i was going to try to get fucked up i would have found something else to do it with mind you). So they try to do some tests on me at the hospital, move me from ward to ward until friday they move me to another hospital with a neurology ward and acute stroke unit. with in 12 hours of arriving they diagnosis that i had a blood clot near my brain, a stroke, and will be on blood thinners for 6-12 months.

what caused it: no specific reason but it could be a number of things. could be the concussion i had in the spring. a new head injury from rugby practice or the 10 minutes of the game i played when sick. dehydration. exhaustion the pill etc.

what does it mean: well i have to go off the pill but onto some other bc because i am forbidden from getting pregnant while on blood thinners. of course you know i really wanted to get pregnant right now. haha. no rugby for the whole duration im on blood thinners (could be a year). have to be careful about drinking--must be in moderation. have to be careful about banging my head, bruises, etc. i have to inject a form of rat posion into me to thin my blood, and yes i'm staying here and finishing my program. i don't back down this easy.

thanks to everyone who sent messages, emails, texts, and comments. it really meant a lot.

on a random note: cnn just had a story America Votes 2008: Guliani prepared for alien attack?" GOOD LORD!

also if you were reading runzoo959.blogspot.com it's not being directed here. so yeah.